It's bad enough that we have to wait an extra hour for Saturday's (Sept. 11) "Big Brother 5" -- thanks a lot, U.S. Open women's champion Svetlana Kuznetsova.

The wait might be worth it (probably not, but a guy can always hope) if there were more going on in the game. But with the most entertaining players long gone and only a couple of possible outcomes for the night's elements, we'd really rather be in bed by now.

The only real suspense (for those of us who don't watch the live Internet stream) is whom Head of Household Drew will nominate for eviction opposite Nakomis, since it's pretty much a given that she's going up. Will it be his cuddle-bug Diane on the block, or his last link to the Four Horsemen (hee -- remember those guys?), Michael?

That's not going to fill an hour, alas, so we get interminable wheel-spinning and get-to-know-your-final-four montages to kill time. To wit:

Nakomis and Diane have both gained a little weight during their time in the house. They talk about it a lot, prompting Michael to wonder why, if they're so concerned about their waistlines, they don't put down the chips, have a salad and use the well-equipped gym a little.

Diane volunteers to be nominated -- although she later whines about it -- so that she won't be put in the position of voting out Nakomis and therefore won't break the girl-alliance pact. Drew figures a final three of himself, Diane and Michael will set him up pretty well.

Everyone notices the Incredible Shrinking Table, notes that the four youngest players are the only ones left.

Drew and Diane make out some more, and we get yet another example of how each's view of their relationship doesn't quite fit with the other's. (Best line, courtesy of Diane: "We've been dating for two months -- that's a long time.") Diane wonders if she's maybe falling in love, planning family visits and possibly picking out china. Drew is still not sure whether Diane qualifies as his girlfriend, but is willing to see where things go post-game.

All that, and we're still only 20 minutes in. Sigh.

Next up is a pointless luxury competition, wherein everyone gets a chance to destroy pieces of the others' clothing they really hate. Much glee is taken in sending Nakomis' giant black pants out of the "Big Brother" compound via slingshot and in burning the loud yellow shirt Jase gave Cowboy. The upshot is everyone gets to pillage a clothing rack for a couple of minutes and get some new duds.

It means nothing, but we've killed 10 more minutes of the hour, so there's that. Then Drew and Cowboy play a little joke on Diane wherein the guys switch places in bed when she gets up to go to the bathroom and see how long it takes her to notice.

Following a few more minutes of Diane whining about whether she'll be nominated, we finally get to the reason for this tennis-delayed hour: the final nomination ceremony. Drew goes through the key rigmarole (question: Why doesn't the Wheel o' Keys get smaller when the table does?) and nominates Nakomis (surprise) and Diane (whoopee).

Drew's plan to get rid of Nakomis hinges mostly on him or Michael winning the veto. That will play out in Tuesday's show. Meanwhile, it's bedtime.